sick of waiting on my brother to learn how to walk
sick of praying for the sidewalk to hold him up & it never will
ma, remember when the siren used to sound, my heart once gave a fuck
now i live in the same city as my sister & you know that we never talk
think of leaving for a pack of smokes & catching the bus & how cliché it is
meanwhile Jimmy’s in the backyard beating the kids & the dogs get out
we embarrass ourselves in a notebook from ten years past, we say “it is what it is”
picture us kids of the stoop, saying “one day we’ll be bigger than this”
how could I forget that anna is dead when just yesterday I saw her ghost
as we watched the bird-swells up & down the coast holding hands
in the way the waves crashed & we were the least drunk we’d ever been (I still say a life lived)
now the silence has us questioning if this is someone special at all
how little it’d have cost us
to have meant more to one another
how little it’d have cost us
to have held on to the tethers
little powder in the palm
little money on the floor
sweaty prayer for Solomon
who could keep a perfect heart
for the kingdom of each other
the metro tickets blowing in our faces while we fight
& the pillow still warm from the night before
what we talk about when we talk about love
what the mouths are mouthing in the photographs
what we feel when the walls start punching back
what we talk about when we talk about love
what we talk about when we slam the door
what we talk about when we borrow a stranger’s phone to make a call
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